求英语大神帮我看看这篇雅思写作

1. 求一篇雅思的英语作文

Should ecation and healthcare be free of charge and funded by the government, or should it be the responsibility of the people to pay for these services?

The improvement of the life level e to the economic development has led people to focus more on their spiritual life, with their ecation and healthcare inclusive, but who has to be responsible for the cost of ecation and healthcare has been raised onto heated discussion.

Health care and ecation, two of the basic elements in social life, are always in the concern of the public. Some people suggest that the service in these two fields should be paid by the government and be free to the public; while others believe it to be the ty of the people to pay on themselves. As to me, the coverage on ecation and healthcare should be made the ty of the government while leaving some special demands to be burdened by indivials.

Government free provision of ecation and healthcare can demonstrate their responsibility in serving the people. Having fulfilled their obligations to the country in the form of taxes, citizens have the right to enjoy the service in return from the government, with ecation and health care being the two basic ones. Also, as the ty carrier in promoting social development, by guaranteeing the right of ecation and health care, the government are enabled to encourage citizens to make more contributions to the society.

Government’s investment on these two fields is beneficial to ensure social equality. Being free of charge, every citizen can take advantage of these social services, without the worries about being treated unfairly e to their lack of social resources, such as their social status and human network. Besides, this will be helpful to rece the difference between the rich and the poor, at least in these two basic rights, creating a more harmonious social atmosphere.

Admittedly, if the citizens are wealthy enough, or when they demand some special service, or when the government is too limited in its budget, indivials’ sharing some of the cost may also seem to be reasonable. However, rare cases of particular requirements do not represent the general pursuits of the public, and limitation in budget does not free the government of its accountability.

To sum up, government should provide free ecation and healthcare to the public and pay the cost. Only when people are better ecated and healthier in physiques, can the society be more harmonious in atmosphere and dynamic in development.

这是我在雅思救星上看到的一篇雅思作文范文，相信对你有用，你也可以去看看其它的范文。

2. 100分悬赏，求大家帮我看看两篇雅思英语作文，一篇修改前，一篇修改后

看了你的文章,我终于明白你为什么在分以下了.

分析一下你的优势和劣势:
你的优势:1, 能够清楚理解题目含义 ; 2, 有一定的逻辑性和良好的思维能力.
3,有一定单词量和英文基础.

你的不足: 1, 应该重点练习并熟悉英文的语句结构,和词汇用法.虽然你有一定的单词量,但是你对他们的用法还不够熟练. 例如:你首段的第一句,就是一个没有主语的重句.还有第二段第一句中的"reap",用在这里不太恰当,因为"reap"的获得是作为努力的成果而获得的,用在这里似乎词不达意.
2, 觉得你的写作方式很原创,一看就知道是你写的.呵呵.因为我个人觉得你的好多话都是你个人临场发挥的.我的建议是你平时能够多读一些文章,熟悉各种词汇和语句的用法,再把你认为经典的收藏为己用.这样久而久之,你的写作自然就有突破.
3, 论证段的语句不要太复杂,尽量简单清晰.如果太复会有很做作的感觉,反而会对论点起到反作用.我看了你的那篇被改过的文章,就好很多.看起来比较顺畅,可读性强,不蹩脚,得6分绰绰有余.你可以将其与你写的进行对比,然后用心去体会他们之间的差别和不同,逐渐改变你的写作习惯.

总之, 写作是练出来的,即使像楼上两位仁兄辛苦的替你改完,不知道对你写作的真正作用会有多大呢,至少我看不到它的效果,(声明:词话绝无冒犯他们的意思). 另外送你一句话,切忌繁冗复杂,崇尚简单明快.因为你想要的毕竟只是 6分而已 - 希望你能取得真经 :)

3. 请英语达人帮忙看看我这篇雅思写作能得多少分

同意一楼，此外，剔除那些模板句后，实质性的东西很少，也就是说论证不饱满；文章在许多专不必要的地方用了“属大词”（formal words or terms），却恰恰显示出作者驾驭这门语言的能力欠缺，仿佛小孩说大人话。。。
建议多看些原汁原味的文章，莫过早模仿所谓的“雅思高分范文”

4. 求助~雅思作文。请英语好的人帮忙分析一下这篇文章的写作构思 英文

首先解释"leisure activities"课外活动,然后解释ecational 有教育意义的,举例说明哪些活动是有教育意义的,意义是什么.比如看电影,增长知识,培养情操等等.最后解释"put thepressure on children" 不要给孩子施加压力,举例说明给孩子压力的很多做法导致的后果,比如作业很多,写到半夜有害身体健康等等

5. 求一篇英语雅思作文

一、雅思大作文开头：
开头要短小;要有立场和观点;避免模板。
如： the amount of advertising on TV be increased or decreased?
Nowadays many people discuss whether we need …or not.
Now whether…. has become a very hot debate in society.
As far as this topic is concerned, different people have different opinions. Some people think that ……Others believe that …... I think both views have their reasons.
Recently the ... has been brought into focus ... Nowhere in history has the issue been more visible. In this essay, I aim to explore this complicated phenomenon from diverse perspectives, identify the relevant contributing factors and bring up some effective measures.
二、雅思大作文结构：
一个paragraph一个idea;避免过多examples, esp personal examples.;段落间的平衡
三、雅思大作文语言：
避免idioms, famous sayings
避免poetic language
Explain your point…then explain it again in a different way
Use “a mix of longer and short sentences”
以上从开头、结构、语言等三个方面对雅思大作文的写作技巧进行了简单的总结，建议考生们可以根据以上建议，并通过针对性的练习来逐步掌握雅思大作文的写作技巧，从而在雅思作文考试中取得更好的成绩。

6. 各位英语大神，我是雅思考生，写作不强，能不能帮忙批改这篇作文，再问一下，这作文能不能5或5.5分啊

你写一边倒，写点利再写弊，整个逻辑更完整。题目是食品生产机械化，添回加剂什么的虽然给答生产效率产量什么带来明显增长，但是过度使用会危害人身体健康，也有可能导致劳动力过剩。感觉你写劳动力过剩的比重有点大，所以你前面可以先写点这个带来的好处。5.5可以。

7. 求雅思写作单项在6.5以上的同学交流下经验哈！我英语基础很一般，考前需要练习写大概多少篇雅思写作

关键是词汇量还有词汇的替换还有句子长度和句型复杂度，不要用那种太初高中的词汇，然后文字论点要清晰。。。等等，你考A类还是G类？小作文一般什么水平能多少分？

8. 求大神帮翻译一下雅思小作文题目（中文→英语）

反反复复发

9. 求一篇雅思英语作文~~急用啊！280字左右。

The view of new technology taking place of the old ones.

The new will take the place of the old sooner or later,so in my eyes it is acceptable and normal that the new-born technology has superseded those old ones.In the field of media ,as a matter of fact,more and more people use E-mail instead of writting a letter.Also you could find that newspaper become less popular among the teenagers,they are more likely to surf the internet to get touch with the information around the world.And these days In China the government has already carried out the plan that replace the analog signals with digital signals for TV（模拟信号向数字信号转变）.You could also find that more and more people are carrying their own laptops to work,and they just become smaller and faster.In a word, the whole world is moving toward a more advanced level,so it is to the technology.It is a rather good phenomena that more and more technologies are born in this world.So it is a unstoppable trend that the new take the place of the old.I think rather optimistic to this question.